Born and raised up as a Kenyan, anyone will understand why I love weddings. In a span of 9 months now, I have missed 10 weddings in Kenya with a probability that I would have attended more, courtesy of invitations from my friends.
“We are not fond of weddings in Norway, but Summer is around the corner, most people get married in the Summer. Just keep your eyes open as you pass by the churches and if you see one, ask to be allowed to pop in, they might not, but just insist you would like to join them.” Advised Ann.
Two of my friends got married last month, April is here and many more weddings. Two weeks back while visiting Germany I just couldn´t resist the urge to gate crush into a Turkish wedding. Outside one restaurant was a convoy of black cars and the bride had just arrived. “Oh, there is a wedding here, this one I am definitely attending” I thought aloud. “Sure, if you want to attend, go ahead, I am pretty sure it is a Turkish wedding. The Turkeys are very many in Germany, making the highest population of the foreigners here and they love to hold weddings in this specific restaurant, especially those living in Heidelberg, said my friend Nik.
So I strategize on how to get in, wondering if the wedding was by invite only. I see a group of three men smoking and decide to approach them, scared but optimistic that I will get a positive feedback.
“Hi, my name is bla bla, I am visiting Germany and I would really love to attend this wedding. I hear it is a Turkish wedding and I am interested to see how the Turkish people conduct their weddings”. I said with a lot of innocence.
“Sure, you are welcome, just go ahead. I am afraid that most people here do not speak English but don´t worry about that.” Said one of the three men.
I am still scared on how to make it to the restaurant looking lost, so I let them know that I will be by my friend’s car by the roadside and request them to come for me once they are done smoking. Deal sealed! A few minutes later they come for me and I join them to the restaurant as Nik leaves.
I make an entrance with the 3 men, and I realise everyone is gazing at me, as if to ask “Who is this black woman without an invitation?” One of the men leads me to a lady and says something to her in Germany before he translates the same to me.
“ This is my wife, she speaks no English just like most of the people here. I have told her about you, so she will take care of you, feel free and enjoy your stay” he said.
I sit down and relax, enjoying a Turkish dance, the bride is on the dance floor with and her girlfriends. She looks pretty young and excited. After about 15 minutes of dance, it is getting hot and they decide to take a break. The bride goes to sit and immediately the high tables takes my attention. Nothing really special about it, and the drinks are actually 1.5 litres of Coca Cola and Fanta.
The bride is seating alone and I am just wondering, where is the groom hiding at. A few minutes later, here he comes and joins the lady on the high table and realise …..’.oh he was actually among the three men I talked to outside´.
I like the way the this wedding is being conducted, typical Turkish music played at the corner by one of the DJ feels the air. Lots of movements from one place to another and it is really a casual setting. The bride and the groom take turns to chat with their friends and family probably giving them some piece of advise.
Ushers seem to be walking around giving food and finally they reach to me. One part of me really wants to have a taste of the food, the other part of me is greatly ashamed so I debate on what to do. My friend who took me in comes back to check on me “ Hope you are enjoying yourself, please get yourself a share of our wedding meal.
Turkish wedding meal
Nice aroma fills the room, most people seem to be enjoying the meal which is served with a selection of fruits. The main food is another version of pilau in Kenya. It tastes really delicious.
It has been 45 minutes back since I came in and I don’t see any kind of procedures to be followed. I am informed the wedding will continue the following day and where the exchange of rings will take place.
For me this is all very different from the kind of weddings I am used to in Kenya. There has to be someone presiding over, preferably a church leader, some form of a standard procedure, which I don´t like so much and the high table is a high table as the name suggests. You can be assured no plastic bottles of Fanta and Coca cola laying on the high table.
At no point will you see the groom taking his sweet time outside to get a puff and then come back to the restaurant, that was very new to me. All in all, it was a great wedding, at least got an opportunity to attend a wedding of it´s own kind. May the two live happily thereafter.
Happy Easter, enjoy and God bless!!!!